39 today and therefore entitled to ramble on a bit.
It's my birthday today, and I'm happy about it, because I'm where I wanted to be at this age. Five children, house, land. I think I even wanted to be a single mother.
I'm not showing off - most of the children weren't planned, and it's not always a walk in the park. The house needs expensive work and the land is great, compared to nothing, but not as nice as something more useful, if you see what I mean. Like a south-facing, more level piece. With a stream.. and a little bridge... stocked with trout..
Yes, it's not that. But you have to be glad for what you have, and for what you have access to, which amounts to the same thing.
Flying kites, for example. We're on the top of a hill here: you'd think it'd be easy, but the thermals aren't right, according to my teens. And we uncovered our old (newish) picnic basket the other day in our manic clear-out and knocked the spider webs off it. It's the real deal, with proper crockery and cutlery and little napkins. I bought it in a closing down sale a few years ago - for about £5! But we've never used it.
So the plan for my birthday celebration is this: a very posh picnic, with home-made pies, pasties, pop, salad and cakes, and we're off to Castle Hill with big tartan blankets, footballs and all the kites.
But not today, because the ground is soaked and we're due more rain. We'll go and do it when the weather has cleared up and summer has properly returned. Today we'll just chill out at home. I might watch a DVD. I've got some smoked salmon marinating, some decent coffee to drink and a lot of reading to do. Oh and I'll get big children to look after little children and have a long bath.
I was telling my teens last night - who had asked how I felt about approaching 40 - in that (un)appealing morbid way I have, that one of my best friends died when we were 17, so now every year is a bonus to me and definitely something to celebrate. It's good to feel grateful. I think when someone close to you dies at a young age you often kind of feel like you're living for them too. Blimey, she loved life. Such a vibrant girl. She wouldn't be celebrating her 39th with a DVD, a book and a bath! We'd be talking helicopters, champagne and celebridees! Mind you, they'd have thought that about me when I was 17. Maybe Kimby would have changed beyond all recognition too.
As for the grey hair and wrinkles, bring it on! I'm going for a dramatic hag-type look. When I reach a certain age I might start wearing velvet cloaks, like my friend Morgy. Ah but no - they're a bit impractical for me: you can't do the gardening in them. Well she does, but I wouldn't like her laundry pile. Hmmm... must get in touch with her too. Though if she doesn't get in touch with me on my birthday, it's a poor do.... Did I remember her last birthday..? Maybe not..
*Wanders off, muttering....*
I'm not showing off - most of the children weren't planned, and it's not always a walk in the park. The house needs expensive work and the land is great, compared to nothing, but not as nice as something more useful, if you see what I mean. Like a south-facing, more level piece. With a stream.. and a little bridge... stocked with trout..
Yes, it's not that. But you have to be glad for what you have, and for what you have access to, which amounts to the same thing.
Flying kites, for example. We're on the top of a hill here: you'd think it'd be easy, but the thermals aren't right, according to my teens. And we uncovered our old (newish) picnic basket the other day in our manic clear-out and knocked the spider webs off it. It's the real deal, with proper crockery and cutlery and little napkins. I bought it in a closing down sale a few years ago - for about £5! But we've never used it.
So the plan for my birthday celebration is this: a very posh picnic, with home-made pies, pasties, pop, salad and cakes, and we're off to Castle Hill with big tartan blankets, footballs and all the kites.
But not today, because the ground is soaked and we're due more rain. We'll go and do it when the weather has cleared up and summer has properly returned. Today we'll just chill out at home. I might watch a DVD. I've got some smoked salmon marinating, some decent coffee to drink and a lot of reading to do. Oh and I'll get big children to look after little children and have a long bath.
I was telling my teens last night - who had asked how I felt about approaching 40 - in that (un)appealing morbid way I have, that one of my best friends died when we were 17, so now every year is a bonus to me and definitely something to celebrate. It's good to feel grateful. I think when someone close to you dies at a young age you often kind of feel like you're living for them too. Blimey, she loved life. Such a vibrant girl. She wouldn't be celebrating her 39th with a DVD, a book and a bath! We'd be talking helicopters, champagne and celebridees! Mind you, they'd have thought that about me when I was 17. Maybe Kimby would have changed beyond all recognition too.
As for the grey hair and wrinkles, bring it on! I'm going for a dramatic hag-type look. When I reach a certain age I might start wearing velvet cloaks, like my friend Morgy. Ah but no - they're a bit impractical for me: you can't do the gardening in them. Well she does, but I wouldn't like her laundry pile. Hmmm... must get in touch with her too. Though if she doesn't get in touch with me on my birthday, it's a poor do.... Did I remember her last birthday..? Maybe not..
*Wanders off, muttering....*
posted by Gill at
08:25
6 Comments
